Jonathan and Shelly

Jonathan and Shelly

Saturday, October 1, 2011

Adoption Orientation Part 1

I will be telling you about the orientation in two parts. There is so much information packed in and this weekend was the same way. It was such an awesome opportunity and we are so thankful to have done it.


The adoption orientation was great. I have never met a greater bunch of individuals. When we arrived we were greeted by Sharon, the receptionist, at Christian Homes. She showed us the room we would be in for the orientation. We were ushered into a large room with 2 1/2 walls full of 8x10 photos of all of the children that have been adopted through Christian Homes. Most of them were later in life photos and some were baby pictures. It was neat to see the "extended family" of the agency. The room had tables in the shape of a giant horse shoe. At every table sat 1 couple, and there were 10 couples present for the orientation. Everyone looked different some were older, some were young, and many different ethnicities. Jonathan and I sat down at the first table on the left of the podium. That was one of the only tables left by the time we got there which is fine by me as I like to sit in the front anyways. After a couple minutes the Christian Homes staff started walking up and introducing themselves to us. It was refreshing to see how easy it was to talk to them all. There was never an awkward moment and the conversations just kept flowing. A few minutes later Bob Parkhill, VP of Christian Homes, walked up to the podium and called the orientation to order. After a quick prayer, he told everyone he would like us to introduce themselves. It was very cool to see and hear the dynamics of the other couples that were there. Bob said something that really stuck with both of us. He said "do not size up the other couples; we are all on the same team not opponents." I could not have agreed more. I was not looking at the other couples in the room and thinking "who is going to be getting our baby?" Instead, I was looking at them all as potential support systems. As we started going around the room we learned that there were couples from all over the United States. 1 couple from New Mexico, one from Arkansas and one from North Carolina (whom I will get to more about later). WOW, couples that committed to travel across the U.S. to work with Christian Homes. What a beautiful picture and made us feel very blessed to live within driving distance of this wonderful organization. The introduction portion of the orientation made everything already worth it.

The next thing on the agenda was for us to learn all of the wonderful things that Christian Homes has to offer birth mothers, the community and the adoptive parents. We listened to a few of the staff members speak about the adoption process. Marketing is a HUGE part of the agency. They advertise at Planned Parenthood's, OB/GYN offices, colleges, Seventeen magazine, and many other popular magazines. Bob let us in on an interesting fact; did you know it takes Christian Homes $6,000 in marketing fee's for 1 baby? Now, Christian Homes does not JUST help birth mothers who are giving their babies up for adoption. They help all mothers who come through the doors no matter if they are giving their babies up or not. We think this is a huge ministry that is lacking in todays society. Some of these mothers who come in to the agencies are just scared or are not sure. I can not remember the exact numbers but about half of the mothers that come into the agency for help are actually putting their babies up for adoption. That is a lot of women who need help. Help with groceries, rent, phone, water etc. Christian Homes will help with what the can. Not only financially, but emotionally as well. They have a therapist on staff at all times or at least one close by.

We also went through how to write birth mother letters, and the photo albums we have to come up with. The photo albums can be no longer than 10 pages (front and back), and stapled in the upper left hand corner. We were very excited to actually see some examples of adoptive parents albums and to hear some reasons why birth mothers chose or did not choose those families for her baby to go to. A birth mother could see a potential adoptive mother wearing a Dallas Cowboys sweater and say "I love the Cowboys" and choose the adoptive family based off that one shirt. Bob told us of a story of a young birth mother, 17, who was reading Gullivers Travels at school. When it came time for her to find the adoptive family she opened an album and the adoptive family had a dog named Gulliver. She chose them. Isn't that neat? SO, it is very important that we be true to ourselves and you never know what will jump out at these women. By the way I do not want you to read this as me saying all of the girls are young. In the next blog I will tell about a birth mom we met who was 38 when she put her baby up for adoption.

The last thing we went over on Friday was outreach programs that we had to do to adopt through Christian Homes. They had 10 different ideas but you had to choose three to do. This seems more like a marketing/research for ourselves out in the community or maybe to make sure we are good about being open about our adoption with our friends and families. In case you were wondering YES this blog does meet one of the requirements. So does my Cupcakes for Our Cupcakes Facebook page, coming, and my adoption group through church with Kathryn. We are more than good on these three things.

That ends part 1 of the blog about the adoption orientation. Please check back tomorrow where I hope to tell you all about the birth mothers, adoptee's and birth parents who have already adopted through Christian Homes. What a awesome weekend!

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